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Autism – an article by Bex Moore

Hello there. My name is Bex – I am 28 years old and I live in England with my parents. I was diagnosed with autism at the beginning of my twenties. At the same time, I was diagnosed with Jacobsen Syndrome a rare chromosome disorder (11q deletion) and polycystic kidney disease. 

All through my life and still now I feel like the odd one out and I do not fit it. Even though I am 28 I have never felt like an adult. I struggle to process and understand a lot of things, I find it hard to make friends and I get obsessed with things a lot too. I have been told by many people I see the world and do things much more differently to everyone else. Sometimes I do not even think I am from earth. 

Many people say I do not look, sound, or act autistic and there is nothing wrong with me. I have never ever felt accepted and believed both in my own family and out in the rest of the world. This is something that really upsets and hurts me especially as it is some of my own family saying these things to me.

 I have a blue disabled badge but when I get out of the car, I do get many strange looks because I do not have a wheelchair or any type of aids, I do not have a limp either. 

What I do have is 2 badly deformed and very painful feet which have been operated on many times, one of my toes has been removed too. I have 2 badly dislocated, fused, and painful elbows along with heart problems.

 A few times people have come across to our car but thankfully my Mum and or Dad have been there to help me. 

A few people have said to me it is not very obvious something is wrong with me and if I had something to show that I have a disability and autism it would be much easier to believe and accept me. 

When my Dad shared with me the sunflower lanyards I was of course delighted and really grateful there was something to wear to help me show I have autism. Unfortunately, since wearing my lanyard I have had many stressful and sad experiences because of funny looks, people whispering to each other, and I’ve seen nobody is bothered I’m wearing a lanyard either and doesn’t seem to be aware I may need extra help and support….

 My biggest worry here is if they do this to me, they will do it to other people which breaks my heart. I have heard many stories about people mis using the sunflower lanyards which really spoils it for people who have genuine disabilities. On a more positive I have heard many positive stories as well which I am over the moon about too.  

Thank you for reading.

Bex

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NewsAutism – an article by Bex Moore